Friday, June 12, 2009 .

this morning,
i wondered what it would be like if you loved me more than i loved you.

would we be happier?
would i leave you?
would the tables be turned?
would you come to realise what sacrifice meant?
would you understand how i felt?
would i mean more to you?

and then as day gave way to dusk,
i brushed those thoughts away
the same way i brushed the tears off my face,
as i understood
that i was never meant to find out all that.

take it or leave it,
this is exactly the way it's suppose to be,
and i took it
and held on
as tightly as i could
as tightly as the day we first held hands.
and despite all thats said and done,
i'll never let go.

i love you.

screaming infidelity at 5:07 PM
------ Sunday, May 03, 2009 .

No, this is how it works
You peer inside yourself
You take the things you like
And try to love the things you took
And then you take that love you made
And stick it into some
Someone else's heart
Pumping someone else's blood
And walking arm in arm
You hope it don't get hard
But even if it does
You'll just do it all again

screaming infidelity at 10:20 PM
------ Saturday, April 11, 2009 .

could you be so cold, yet still need someone to hold.

screaming infidelity at 2:02 AM
------ Tuesday, March 31, 2009 .

sometimes,
people don't understand the weight of their words,
and the importance of their presence.
or in this case, the lack thereof.

screaming infidelity at 12:52 PM
------ Thursday, January 31, 2008 .

I was driving home some weeks ago, and since it was midnight, roads were pretty empty.

There was a motorcycle carrying a man, probably in his early 60s, and a lady whom, i presume, is his wife. They were going pretty slowly as i came up from behind, and we both stopped at a red light shortly ahead. I turned to my right, and the couple sat there without a word, waiting for the light to turn green. Just then, the old man started coughing and his wife stroked his back tenderly, the way a mother does a child. When his cough stopped, she held him tightly from behind. And i guess with half her face buried in his back, she couldn't see him smile as he turned his head slightly to look at her.

screaming infidelity at 1:21 PM
------ Sunday, January 06, 2008 .

It's been a long day, and I really wanted to come home and crash.
but instinct switched the computer on and I found myself checking my email.
I found this, forwarded from a friend whose words i take seriously.
He said:
"Pls see. I'm not one to forward emails but this perhaps deserves some attention.."

http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/video.asp?video=fur_farm&Player=qt

After viewing it, I find myself unable to fall asleep.

I'm not too good at creating links, but to say it deserves some attention is grossly understated.
Please spare this video some time.

Thank you.

screaming infidelity at 1:27 AM
------ Friday, November 16, 2007 .

the notion of taking of and flying into the sky, high above the world, is and old cliche.
oakley shades indeed.
but when one feels down and out,
and maybe, just maybe, alone.
( i say 'alone' because i've recently discovered the number of lonely people there are out there )


taking off might sound good.


don't you think?


visit friends in melbourne, manchester, california, or all of them in a night.
fly to the eiffel tower and back before bedtime.
take a trip around antartica on a hot afternoon, away from the heat and humidity.

or just park your ass somewhere in the middle of the stratosphere
only for a while though, cos the air is thin, and you might faint if you're like me and fall to the ground and die cos you're not invulnerable like superman.

or maybe flying and looking at the world, from a place where no one else can, might make you feel more alone.
the distance from ground, and isolation from all the hustle and bustle might be as theraputic as it can be alienating.


"throw your arms around my neck
and hold me tightly
there's a lot that we will get
i'm asking you
let your diamond bracelet fall
over the ice age
over the ice age

throw your arms around my neck
and whisper softly
of a thing that we will get
i'm asking you
let your diamond bracelet fall
over the ice age
over the ice age... "

- Pete Yorn

screaming infidelity at 10:32 PM
------